Monday, November 21, 2005

A tough realization...

Well Tori is all fixed up, home safely, and has pretty new brake lights to show for it. They tell me she was a good girl too. Mommy is so proud. :P

In other news……

After talking to a friend tonight I was struck by the thought that everyone has their own version of the truth. We truly do hear what we want to hear and see what we want to see. It’s more than just how we interpret someone’s tone of voice or facial expression. It’s also about how our brains or maybe our hearts fool us.

I think we usually only get one of two kinds of filters. Most of us hear only bad things or only good things. Or maybe we have different filters for different things.

I tend to see the good in people. I think everyone has a good motive and that they don’t mean anyone any harm. I don’t have the same view of myself. I only hear the bad things about myself.

I’m fat. Ugly. Lazy. Stupid. Untalented. Unlovable. Irresponsible. Unworthy. Too much trouble. And did I mention fat?

The only way to get through my filter is perseverance. Thankfully, I have several friends and loved ones with a LOT of perseverance. Or maybe they are just stubborn. No. Not MY friends. :P

But this realization isn’t really about me. It’s about my friend. It’s about trying to get through to someone who isn’t hearing the same thing that someone else is saying. It’s about how you can help them hear the real truth. And it’s about how that truth might hurt them, but still be better for them in the long run.

No two people’s definition of love is the same, but sometimes two people’s definitions can be so different that they aren’t even in the same universe. In those cases you have to hurt someone to help them. Even if it makes you feel like a bitch. Because if being a bitch can help someone move on and one day be happy then you have to do it, right?

So why is there an ache in my chest and tears in my eyes? I guess I’m not very good at being a bitch and tonight that’s not a good thing.

1 comment:

Margo said...

Yes, we are stubborn. And the fact that being blunt (not a bitch -- just blunt) hurt you so much shows what a wonderful person you are.